Friday, January 6, 2012

Those We're "Leaving Behind"

Leaving behind sounds a bit too dramatic for me, but you get the idea.

We haven't told too many people about our upcoming adventure, we are slowly opening up our "circle of trust" so to speak, but so far it mostly includes immediate family, a few select friends, who is reading this blog post.

There are several reasons we aren't telling everyone we know about this trip. A. We don't want to risk losing our jobs prematurely, and B.  We don't know how people will react, but history has told us that most people will either be indifferent, judgmental, or discouraging.

I don't need everyone to be rooting us on and wanting to know every detail of our trip, but I don't think it's unreasonable for people who care about us to be genuinely excited for us, although I know not to expect that.  It's frustrating because I had a realization a couple of years ago that now helps all of this make sense to me.  My husband and I do not want kids right now (if ever), for many reasons, but for the most obvious - we're selfish and OK with it and just want to spend our money on ourselves and our adventures!  At least we know this about ourselves and aren't having babies just because all of our friends are. 

So that is where my realization comes in.  Many of our friends started getting pregnant about two years ago.  They kept asking us if we were going to be next, etc.  We didn't understand their choice to have kids at that point because it wasn't something we were interested in.  Then one day it struck me - this is directly parallel to our travels and the way people often react to us when we take trips.  It doesn't matter what your dreams, goals, and passions are in life, it just matters that you reach out for them.  If you want to be a mom or dad and that is your dream right now, I can see the joy and satisfaction this brings you, and I feel genuine excitement and happiness for you.  I can share in these amazing emotions because I care about you and I want you to be happy and fulfilled.  I may not "get it" just yet, because I don't want that, but it doesn't matter because I love you and your joy brings me joy. 

I just hope my friends and family will be genuinely happy for us in this way.  I know some are, and I greatly appreciate those who have been supportive.



  1. Or...the ones you're taking along for the ride of their life! We can't go through life as though we have the luxury of endless time on earth; going through the motions and reducing the gift of this moment to another piece of the blur. Life is meant to be lived and lived fully regardless of the dream. It's a big world, "someone's got to paint it"!

    Livin' the dream

    1. I love your perspective! Thank you for your comment, I completely agree...